me and my stories.

fridae night was spent outside with marie who caame back from business trip in time.

fridae night was also spent at DXO with Zul and Yana and their friends. Met some new friends and hung out with them at esplanade for a bit.

saturday morning - lost my voice.

saturdae evening was spent at cellar door taking food orders. Still no voice. attempted to speak but sounded like the girl from exorcist.

After work wss spent with yana and her friends, then it was kamal and sandra. Spent most of the night with Sandra anyway.

Sunday morning …mummy’s birthday but mummy not in town. Rested whole day and will be headed out for an event pretty soon.

-sabs-

spent the evening outside yesterday basically doing nothing. i was with kamal for a bit and got my copy of Thomas’s CD. OMG he is so hot! Too bad he was too tired to hang out so Kamal had to send him back to his hotel….freaking FULLERTON!

me and Kamal had the usual dinner "date". we sat together, sipped coffee, pretended to look hot and end up laughing over the sillest things. I’m giving myself another year before i turn into his partner in crime.

After that i was suppose to head to Zouk but my friend bailed out on me, so i ended up chilling at the esplanade. i did meet some interesting people last night, and it was nice to see Yana and Zul again.

That aside i have bad bad cramps.

Will be leaving for work in an hour soon. I’ll finally be doing the night shift at TCD tonight with some guy named Josh. Hope all will be good. After that would prob head down to meet Thomas at Harry’s BQ. Am hoping to meet Kamal and Sally there. And maybe the usual guys from the group? I don’t know.

Hate this weather. It makes me wanna get under the covers and snuggle up and fall asleep. So NOT productive.

-sabs-

they say that if your eyelashes drop, someone misses you very very badly. or someone is thinking about you.

today two of my eyeslashes dropped. 

i wonder who misses me. or is it my mascara?

hope its the former… hehehee!

-sabs-

today was an okay day. I woke up late and went to work feeling extremely tired due to staying out late last night. I was in the studios doing recording till 3 am. Sigh. Tonight will be no different.

Was at restaurant today and i had fun doing the usual things. By that i mean serving customers and taking orders. I don’t know why i love working at this place so much. I just love the fact that everyday is different, in the sense that i will get new customers to deal with each time. Nothing is boring, nothing is constant. of course, there is a downside. Unreasonable customers. Enough said.

that aside….

after work was spent roaming a new area. Playing with monkeys. Walking in the rain. Getting wet.

Tomorrow onwards is a brand new day for me. Tomorrow onwards, things will change, and hopefully for the better. I have faith that things will work out for me, and for people around me, even though these days the gloomy skies don’t seem to go away.

Was sent an email wedding invite today from my old pal selene. omg that girl is getting married and I’m so happy for her. She had her photos online in some traditional japanese korean costumes and she looked so pretty. I feel bad that we haven’t met up for like months and now she’s invited me to her wedding. We use to be so close!

dimitri this friday and marie has cancelled on me. She’s sent out of the country again, which makes me realise how lucky she is to be able to travel FOR her job. She’s not an air-stewardess or anything, just that she gets to go on lotsa last minute trips to wierdest places. She’s probably cursing away right now, cos i for one, know she wanted to go and party very very badly…. but oh well, nvm. i will find a way to spend my friday night.

Perhaps its time i stay home.

-sabs-

what a depressing title for my blog. these days everything seems depressing and the bad stuff becomes worse. the weather is all gloomy and my body is just aching and everything else going on just seems wrong.

and Radiohead’s creep is playing on the radio now. Bah.

No one is home today. No one will be home for a week. I will be depressed from now till mid Dec. That’s if things are even looking up for me. I have planned so many things this week but it seems like now I have to be really careful with everything.

Bad enough people around me aren’t doing too good. All of us are in the same boat, whether we like it or not. It’s the boat heading straight for the highest waterfall.

–

what on earth is wrong with the radio playlist today?

987 is playing Jet’s Look What You’ve Done…and if i’m not wrong its Vertical Horizon after this. Argh.

–

On another note, the whole idea of Dimitri and Zoukout does not seem very appealing anymore. Maybe it still does somewhere in my head but right now it doesn’t sound very good. Hmm.

I hope everything works out for all of us. I’m going off to cook now. It’s the only thing that will take my mind off things.

-sabs-

Bought the new Madonna album yesterday…good stuff.

yesterday was the longest day of my life. It started out great with a Food Fiesta at Aaron’s church and as usual i enjoyed myself. It’s the food la, that’s just it. Chocolate fondue. Tom Yum soup! Arthur was with me and he bought konnyaku jellies for Magdalene. Didn’t manage to meet Hafiz cos the guy woke up late… It was nice to see Aaron again, but he was busy running around. Met all his friends again, even though i can barely remember their names. Also saw his girlfriend….so pretty already!

The next few hours was alone time for me. I just felt like walking around and checking out some clothes or new things for myself. Bought a book, a soft toy and had a nice cup of chai tea at some small cafe at raffles city shopping centre.

Then later was rush rush…met todd for a bit for dinner and then it was a trip to the cd store followed by a long wait for 171, that comes like once every half hour.

then it was me and the girls.

it was me ingrid sonia and meng, initially. It started with a bottle of wine. then we headed to rouge for some action. not dance…but the live band. It was funny. Then after it was Zouk wine bar. And then it was Zouk. And then i was dragged to DXO. And i don’t know where my head was when i was at DXO. The only thing i knew was that i reached home when it was daylight. Slept for a a half hour and then had to go to work at TCD.

So i was zombified at work.

Will never pull an all day and all nighter ever again. And you know, all that so called fun makes you feel like shit afterwards. Especially when you’re working in a  restaurant the day after. or maybe its just too much to drink.

It scares me to think that i have been out every single weekend for a month and that next week will be no different. I have to save money…big time!

till next update. My stomach still feels wierd.

-sabs-

…that some people can get away with ill behaviour, just by flicking their hair or batting their eyelids?

…that the rich get richer and the poor just have to work harder to make ends meet?

…that people crave for attention only to let it become their downfall?

…that when we want to love unconditionally, we always end up getting hurt.

…that when we were younger, we dressed to look older and then in our 30s we struggle to live young?

…that when you fight with someone you love, you turn on the radio only to hear it play a sad depressing song.

…that we believe how everything happens for a reason, but yet it was still our choice in the first place to give up or give in?

—

friday was my hey day. i spent the afternoon with some acquaintances and the later part of the evening was me and Vanilla latte. I’m going to go broke if i keep spending 5 bucks on coffee every single day. That’s not including all the cab fare and my gluttony side.

18 nov. my primary schmate’s bdae is coming soon. She’s a sweet little thing whom i haven’t contacted for years. My late granddad’s death anniversary is coming up. And not to mention Mummy’s birthday. Hmmm…wonder what i should get for her this year.

Oh, i bought an organizer today. Those diary things which are supposed to keep you on your toes. You know, every year i buy myself a diary and i only use it for like the first few months. Then it gets chucked away somewhere and i only find it in November. Like yesterday for example, i dugged out my dusty 2005 diary and read through all my so called "appointments". Nothing interesting. Well, anyway i got a new one today and hopefully, i will use it more often.

I also helped a friend get a present for some girl today. It was nice to look at all the pretty jewellery again.

Another thing. I have a ""stalker". He’s not stalking me for real but he’s like annoying me big time by asking me out every single day and sending me sleazy smses. And he’s freaking married!!! Is it just me or do i keep meeting people who look at me in this way? Maybe i should change my dressing and start covering myself up more. Like wear a carpet or something…

okay enough for tonight.

-sabs-

i had quite a good sleep today. Early morning…as in 4 am was spent talking to him about god knows what. Work work work and more work. Then slept again only to wake up at 8 am and see mum go off to m’sia. I had planned to wake up and get dressed and follow my dad send her, but that didn’t happen.

Slept again and woke up in time to see dad leave for friday prayers. I was quite happy for a while, cos i finally had the whole house to myself, but in less than 5 mins, my sister walked through the door. Then in another 5 mins, my brotehr walked in as well. And then the house was full of noise again.

Yesterday i decided to buy the new Starsailor album, with the intention of surprising my sister. She’s been babbling about it for some time, so i decided to get it for her, even though she had already listened to the entire cd at TRecords. I got the bonus DVD edition and we spent pretty much the whole night obsessing over the music videos, the cute lead singer and depressing music. James Walsh is irony personified, singing all the depressing songs, but yet giving the tiny smile and showing off his dimples. He’s so cute and at a certain angle, he looks like Diego Luna.

So yeah the whole night Ernie and me were obsessing over finding a man with Diego Luna’s bod ( and ability to dance..hehehe! ) mixed with a James Walsh voice. Tousled hair is a MUST!! Beads of sweat on forehead is also a MUST!!

Anyway, that whole thing aside, today will be a  ‘just me’ day. I have a meeting later at 3…so i have to go get ready. After taht, i’ll see who fits into my schedule or perhaps, hit the bookstores.

I think i’ll be quite happy with my Vanilla latte and a book in hand.

Will update tonight again…

-sabs-

its thursday evening.

and the song playing in my studio now - Lightning Crashes by Live.

Today was a so-so day. I woke up to my ex’s phone call and he was telling me about his work and how he’s pulling through. I was half asleep as he talked but his voice was so clear in my head. And listening to him sound so upset didn’t make it better. I felt a bit sad for him really. If you’re reading this… I hope things will work out for you. It’s hard, but its possible. And you can call me anytime to talk okay?

Went to work feeling sleepy. I was extremely tired for some reason. I don’t understand how i can sleep for 7 hours and still feel tired after. Its like…not purely sleeping, i suppose. And my shoulders ache. And my head hurts. And i’m coughing.

After work was a coffee session with Kamal. Bumped into Mich and Eda and Saadah i think, with her kid. Also saw Shiqa again, who is the same as ever. I went HMV to look for some things too. I miss that place but its not the same as before. It’s like…lifeless.

PLus no cute guys at all!

OKay its time to work. I’ll update again soon.

-sabs-

a short update…

today was spent pretty much lying in my bed and thinking of all my choices. It’s not a difficult thing to decide..this so called "problem" in my head right now, but you know me, i always try to please everyone…which is pretty much impossible.

anyway, the later part of the evening was spent spent with adrian and terence (finally! i met you.) and we were just sitting outside macs waiting for a star to fall. Haha. Lot 1 is not the best place to be when you’re bored, but it beats staying at home sometimes.

some friend of mine came back from aussie recently too. can’t wait to catch up with her. People i know from last time are all coming back "home" for a while, and its been great just catching up with them. Maybe its that time of the year, Xmas is coming and we’re all coming together, and talking about how things have changed since they’ve been gone.

It’s a good thing to know that people are leading happy lives and doing good for themselves, but the downside is that you tend to look at yourself and ask…

" what about me? What has changed about me? Has everything really become better? Have i achieved much in the past 12 months…as compared to last year?"

Or has my life plateued and come to a standstill?

Luckily for me, even though i don’t have that someone i loved so much, anymore, everything else has finally come together. My job and my life is better as compared to the year before.

Thank God for that.

I just wish sometimes things would have worked out for everyone else i know, and that all that sadness i had to go through ( and still do ) would go away.

But then, it wouldn’t have been called Life, would it.

-sabs-